Fridays with Phil

After a wonderful time away, it is good to be back in Australia and back blogging with you.

Home at last, I was recounting one of the more unexpected adventures of the trip.

It was in Bruges, Belgium where I overheard that Michelangelo’s Madonna and Child is housed in a local Church, recently depicted in the movie Monuments of Men.

Ever since I saw first Michelangelo’s David in Florence and his Moses in Rome, I have marvelled at his God-given gift to bring stone to life.

Knowing my walking restrictions, I calculated exactly how far it would take to get there by foot and started out.

When I finally arrived at the Church, it was locked and empty. I managed to sneak through a side-alley door and saw a sculpture of Mary holding an infant Jesus, but after taking a few pictures, I realised that this was not it.

I had ended up even further away from the real Madonna and Child than where I had started. It’s tough when you have worked so hard and moved so far only to find that you’ve arrived at the wrong destination.

In that situation, in life generally, there’s only one thing to do: keep going.

Rather than camping at your mistake, misdirection or wrong destination, I would encourage you to get up, gather your strength and make a change.

Learn from your mistake but don’t let it dampen your resolve to get to your passion.

Your passion could be raising great kids, becoming a generous giver, health, a strong marriage, business success, running a marathon, or an intimate relationship with God.

You will only ever get there if you are heading in the right direction.

There is a difference between moving and moving in the right direction. The difference is velocity.

Speed is all about how fast we move whereas velocity is all about the rate at which we change our position. Velocity is speed with direction.

Many people can be in a frenzy and have great speed but end up back where they started. Others know the direction they want to take but fail to act and procrastinate along the way.

If you’re a leader, building team takes you to a great destination and changes your future potential. If you’re a spender, budgeting and saving money causes you to become generous. If you’re a parent, nurturing, loving and passing on morals causes you to raise kids you will be proud of.

Three questions for you:

1. Is there a lot of activity going on in your world?
2. If so, is that activity moving you, changing your position?
3. If so, are you moving in the right direction?

The key is making sure you’re heading in the right direction. Speed is important, but so is direction.

After adjusting my direction, and even though I was now moving at a much slower pace, I did eventually find the Madonna and Child that day and it was truly beautiful. The journey was certainly well worth it.

Imagine where you could be, or what you could see, if you became aware of the direction you were heading in?

Phil

Bonjour! Today I write to you from the streets of Paris. St Germain is buzzing and the sound of live music fills the air.

One thing I love about Paris is the “joie de vivre”, the “joy of living”, all around.

Parisians know how to enjoy the simple things: the joy of savouring a meal, sipping a glass of red, strolling through the Jardin du Luxembourg by kids playing with boats in fountains, and couples on chairs enjoying each other and the warm sun.

It’s a special place. But so is your life. So slow down and enjoy the simple things.

Let’s face it, I could eat cheese and bread in Australia, the difference is that here, I slow it down and enjoy the moment.

To experience Joie de Vivre in your everyday life, declutter and do what only you can.

When I was first diagnosed with Motor Neurone Disease, I had to decide what areas of my life needed to be left and what areas I needed to continue. Really it wasn’t that hard.

No one else can be a dad to my children or a husband to my wife like I can. No one else could take responsibility for my personal fight with this disease. However others could do pretty much the rest.

It may not need to be that drastic for you, but what are the things from your current task list that only you can do?

I’m not talking about the small details, I’m talking about the big rocks, the things that consume most of your time. Maybe you haven’t yet discovered what only you can do, trust me, it will be a worthwhile exercise.

Whatever it is, do it with all your heart.

If you’re a mum or dad, a friend or spouse, do your very best. There are no second chances at that. Do it well the first time.  To help you with that, this is something I picked up a long time ago and it has framed how I try to live my life as an adult:
1. Find out what you do well.
2. Do a lot of it.
3. Find out what you don’t do well.
4. Don’t do much of it.
5. Find out what others do well.
6. Help them do it.

Today marks my 21st blog. A big thank you to the 15,000+ readers across 60 countries who have taken the time to either read, share, or comment on these blogs.

Healthwise, I am doing better than the doctors expected. After thinking last year would be our final trip to Europe, we have decided to make the most of my mobility and take another trip. This time, we are joined by my late brother’s wife who has never been overseas.

I look forward to catching up with you on my return in four weeks and continuing this blogging journey.

By the way, in November I will be adding “grandpa” to my list of “what I can only do” as we await the arrival of our first grandchild to Jess and Kaiden.

Phil

Your challenge could be your chance.
Your problem, your possibility.
Your trial, your testimony.

If that’s to be the case, you must decide how you are going to face life challenges.

The reason I believe many of us don’t see the chance, possibility or testimony in the midst of challenges is because we do not expect challenges to happen and when they do, we are rocked, surprised and even confused.

Instead, embrace the reality of challenge – it is part of life’s experience.

A kind person will encounter meanness.
A healthy body will need care.
A strong marriage will face struggles.

There will be bad in the good days and good in the bad days.

How can we face and overcome life challenges?

Firstly, don’t be in denial, avoiding the proverbial “elephant in the room,” acting as if a challenge does not exist.

Instead, actively move to face and deal with challenges, just like God did.

Ever since the Garden of Eden, Eve’s apple and Adam’s sin of silence, the world has been different to its initial intent.  I would say this represented a huge challenge. But, what do we see God doing?

In Genesis 3:9, the Bible says “But the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?””

God immediately faced the problem.

God stepped into the situation, seeking out Adam and Eve, He dealt with the problem, and came up with a redemptive solution.

God did not wait for the problem to resolve itself.  In the same way, we need to be proactive about facing and solving challenges.

Secondly, this means that we bring truth to our challenges and we take ownership of them.

Shifting blame does not help solve problems. Mature people are not as concerned about who is at fault as they are about solving the problem. Even if they didn’t cause the mess, they will take ownership of the result and get busy to fix it.

God did not cause the fall of the earth. But, He put his arms around the problem and sent a Saviour.

A parent with a child who is not doing well at school will not just blame the teacher or the school. He or she will care about the problem and take ownership of it to help solve it.

Do you have a challenge today? The easy way around it is to pretend it doesn’t exist or blame someone else for it. But how I see it, there are two options: easy first, hard later, or hard first, easy later.

God’s way is to face the problem now, and thrive in the end.

I’m taking that option.

Phil

Once you fall in love with Africa, there is no turning back.

I am homeward bound after a whirlwind trip, Friday to Friday, 7 days which has left me changed, again.

This was to be my last visit to the Congo after travelling there for the past 7 years speaking to Churches, government sectors, business people and universities.
There is no denying that my heart has knit with the Congolese and with this diverse place.

With the possibility of not coming back here and maybe because of my heart connection with this place, I was uber-conscious of taking it all in, giving as much as I could and not leaving any opportunity unturned.

After arriving in Kinshasa, the capital of DR Congo, I was struck with how different things have become since my very first visit 7 years ago. Airport arrivals was relatively calm and there were no grabs for bribes. The road from the airport was no longer littered with old trucks and cars, in their place, an eight lane highway. And for the first time, I saw street sweepers late at night cleaning up rubbish from the roads.

This may not seem like much but these changes spoke volumes to me. You see, I believe that when we begin to take responsibility for the small things, it creates a culture of valuing all that matters in life.  Isn’t that why we start small by teaching our children to say thank you and please?

I was equally impressed by the schools that have been established. One was started 14 years ago by a Sunday school teacher and is now the most sought after primary school in the city. Other young women are being inspired by this lady’s innovative spirit to bring about real change.

There is a sign that hangs over Nelson Mandela Square (where I am writing this blog) and it says, “It always seems impossible until it’s done“.

The Congolese people are putting impossible to rest.

Another friend is opening a palliative care facility, touching me deeply by naming it “The Phil Camden Palliative Care Centre”. I don’t think he realises what an inspiration he is to me by the incredible fact he has succeeded in the face of real opposition.

People who live with passion, courage and vision to see a better future, despite their present reality, never cease to amaze me.

One such person I had the tremendous privilege to catch up with was Joost van der Westhuizen, South African champion Springbock Rugby player, now living with MND / ALS and working tirelessly for the benefit of other sufferers through the J9 Foundation.

South Africa has no assistance or association to care for MND patients. In fact the only drug available for MND patients is a drug called Rilutek (said to increase life by 3-6 mths) and it is 10 times more expensive in South Africa than in Australia.

The J9 foundation is very much at the pioneering end of making this a better world for MND patients and carers at considerable personal sacrifice.

By far, the hardest part of this trip was saying goodbye to friends I may not see for a while. I have loved investing into the people of the Congo and starting to see many of them step into all God has for them.

Just when I thought it was all over, I don’t think I’m finished with Africa. The people, the place, the potential moves me beyond looking at my human frailties and physical restraints. Plus, I think J9 Foundation could do with a few more friends.

Wherever you are reading this today, I wonder if there is something you have never done before, something that seems impossible but you know you should do it? Take courage from my ponderings today, turn impossible around!

Phil